SQOTW: This Muhammad of Yours is a Dwarf and Fat

No wonder present-day Islam forbids depictions of Muhammad....

From WikiIslam:

Narrated AbuBarzah: AbdusSalam ibn AbuHazim AbuTalut said: I saw AbuBarzah who came to visit Ubaydullah ibn Ziyad. Then a man named Muslim who was there in the company mentioned it to me.

When Ubaydullah saw him, he said: This Muhammad of yours is a dwarf and fat. The old man (i.e. AbuBarzah) understood it. So he said: I did not think that I should remain among people who would make me feel ashamed of the company of Muhammad (peace be upon him).

Thereupon Ubaydullah said: The company of Muhammad (peace be upon him) is a honour for you, not a disgrace. He added: I called for you to ask about the reservoir. Did you hear the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) mentioning anything about it? AbuBarzah said: Yes, not once, twice, thrice, four times or five times. If anyone believes it, may Allah not supply him with water from it. He then went away angrily.

By saying he "heard and understood it", it is saying that the description was accurate. His only thought was that he didn't want to be around those who made him feel ashamed of the company of Muhammad. If the description wasn't accurate, you'd expect him to object or think "these people have no idea what they're talking about" or whatever, right? 

Porn & Muslim Hypocrisy: Egyptian Hubby Watching Porn Online finds Film Starring his Wife

The news that an Egyptian man who went online to watch a porn movie but found the woman starring in the film was his own wife had me in stitches. "It was the first time I watched a porno film and I did this just out of curiosity", oh yeah, sure. Perhaps that would be more believable if it weren't for the fact that Egypt is ranked  number 2 for porn searches worldwide.

If this case highlights anything, it is Muslim hypocrisy. More so than other religious group, Muslims have a fascination with watching women in porn, yet condemn it and the women who star in them more strongly than anyone else.

A prime example of this would be in the case of Saeeda Vorajee a.k.a. the beautiful Sahara Knite. She was disowned by her family and faces death-threats on a regular basis for becoming a pornstar and remaining a practicing Muslim. Yet her cousin is not ostracized when it was he who had discovered her secret whilst watching a UK porn channel.

Still, the mental image of a Muslim women filming a scene for a movie named "Anal Annihilation 3" and then going home to read her Qur'an and prostrating to say her prayers is priceless.

Sahara Knite

From Emirates 24/7 (via TROP):

An Egyptian man who went online to watch a porno film for the first time got the shock of his life when he found that the woman in the film was his own wife.

The man, identified as Ramadan, instantly collapsed in disbelief on the floor at an internet shop before coming round and rushing home to face his unfaithful wife.

The woman first denied his allegations and started to swear at him, prompting her husband to face her with the film.

Unable to deny it any more, she confessed to have betrayed him with her pre-marriage boy friend, telling him she had never loved him although they had four children during their 16-year marriage.

“I found 11 films showing my wife in indecent scenes with her lover….it was the first time I watched a porno film and I did this just out of curiosity,” Ramadan told Egyptian newspapers at his house in the northeastern province of Dakhalia.

“She first denied it and accused me of being insane before I faced her with the films…she then confessed to be still in love with her boyfriend, saying he is as young as her and that I am an old man.”

Ramadan said he had been happy during his marriage life until he logged on to that website. Newspapers did not say whether he decided to divorce her.

Germany: Islamists Use "Lies!" to Gain Converts

This is absolutely hilarious. The name of the project “Read!” is a translation of the German “Lies!” Aptly named, considering they've edited out many of the Jihad verses in the Qur'an's they're handing out.

From the FFI Forum:

GERMANY: Muslims hand out 25 million free korans

The mass proselytization campaign — called Project “Read!” – is being organized by dozens of Islamic Salafist groups located in cities and towns throughout Germany, as well as in Austria and in Switzerland.

The campaign to place a Koran in every German household is being spearheaded by a Rheinland-based Salafist, Ibrahim Abou-Nagie, a Palestinian preacher of hate, who leads a radical Islamic group called “The True Religion” (“Die Wahre Religion”).

According to Die Welt, German authorities view the Koran project, which fundamentalists are using a recruiting tool, as a “most worrisome” campaign for radical Islam. Security analysts say the campaign is also a public-relations gimmick intended to persuade Germans that the Salafists are transparent and “citizen friendly.”

In an effort to improve their image, the Salafists have removed from their “information booths” all literature about the role of women in Islam or the supremacy of Islamic Sharia law over democracy. Moreover, the German translation of the Koran has edited out many of the verses which call on Muslims to make war on non-believers. According to BfV, the German domestic intelligence agency, the German version of the Koran is “rather non-controversial.”

Scripture Quote of the Week: Look at Muhammad, he urinates like a girl!

Making this a regular feature of the blog. It may be a quote from the Qur'an, hadith, or tafsir texts, and it may be twisted, evil or just plain stupid. Today it's a humorous one from the hadith literature. Enjoy the mental picture it creates... or maybe not.

From Abu Dawud, Book 1, Number 0022:

Narrated Amr ibn al-'As: AbdurRahman ibn Hasanah reported: I and Amr ibn al-'As went to the Prophet (peace be upon him). He came out with a leather shield (in his hand). He covered himself with it and urinated. Then we said: Look at him. He is urinating as a woman does. The Prophet (peace be upon him), heard this and said: Do you not know what befell a person from amongst Banu Isra'il (the children of Israel)? When urine fell on them, they would cut off the place where the urine fell; but he (that person) forbade them (to do so), and was punished in his grave.

My Prophet, My Führer

Educational and humorous at the same time. This is a Downfall parody video which has "Hitler" playing the role of Muhammad. All references can be found here.

Cassetteboy vs Nick Griffin vs Question Time

This is an absolutely hilarious video of the hilarious Miss Nick Griffin.

The Qur'an CHALLENGE!

This has got to be one of the most funniest videos  (3 min 9 sec)  I've watched so far this year.  Other than the fact that most of the issues discussed here are from the hadith and sira literature, not the Qur'an, I think what makes this video so funny is that it's accurate in its description of Muhammad's behavior. Enjoy.